a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
