i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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