dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
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I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
You need a sexual gate keeper
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Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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