Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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