i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
