Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
