hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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