I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
