Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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