Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
