Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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