Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
