I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Randomize
