I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Randomize
