If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize