Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
