It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize