Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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