operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
either way he was missing a nipple.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
