she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
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