covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
