hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
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