I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
