That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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