if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Randomize
