i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize
