and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
