I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
i just wanna soil my oats bro
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Mom said you looked used
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Randomize
