You surviving the open bar?
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If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
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