Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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