didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize