My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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