Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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