Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Randomize
