You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
