I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Even the bartender felt bad for me
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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