i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
