i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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