well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
