okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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