ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
false alarm, still single
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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