this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be still, my beating vagina.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize