That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
