too bad you live with your parents still
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
