high people should be assigned attendants
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
