Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
