You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
