I'm really into asian looking animals
we're chasing vodka with high fives
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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