Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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