I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
