Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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